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AT HOME | a blog by Joanna Gaines

Chip's New Year's Revelation

January 2, 2017


Jo and I sometimes don’t see eye to eye on stuff. She looks at something one way and in her gut she thinks she’s right and I look at it an entirely different way. I wish that she could get with the program and just see things the way that I do. (Of course, I’m kidding – we all know Jo’s usually right.) If Joanna and I, who are best friends, don’t see lots of things the same way – how on earth do we expect a world of strangers to magically align? The reality is, we may not all get on the same page and I think that’s okay.

This past year has been tough. In my lifetime, I can’t recall humanity being more divided. Plenty of folks are sad and scared and angry and there are sound bites being fed to us that seem fueled by judgement, fear and even hatred. Jo and I refuse to be baited into using our influence in a way that will further harm an already hurting world, this is our home. A house divided cannot stand.

If there is any hope for all of us to move forward, to heal and to grow – we have got to learn to engage people who are different from us with dignity and with love. Joanna and I have personal convictions. One of them is this: we care about you for the simple fact that you are a person, our neighbor on planet earth. It’s not about what color your skin is, how much money you have in the bank, your political affiliation, sexual orientation, gender, nationality or faith. That’s all fascinating, but it cannot add or take away from the reality that we’re already pulling for you. We are not about to get in the nasty business of throwing stones at each other, don’t ask us to cause we won’t play that way.

In 2017: We have decided to change the conversation.

You wanna talk about how to build bridges between people that disagree? We want to be a part of that conversation. Do you want to talk about healing and compassion and kindness and restoration? We’re in the restoration business, we can for sure make time for that.

I think we are all here for a reason. I think we all have a call on our lives. Your role is not my role, and thank goodness, because there is so much unique and important work to be done. Jo and I feel called to be bridge builders. We want to help initiate conversations between people that don’t think alike. Listen to me, we do not all have to agree with each other. Disagreement is not the same thing as hate, don’t believe that lie.

Also, let’s cut each other a little slack. This living out loud thing is not for the faint of heart. Jo and I don’t want to hide, we want to live brave & bold lives and we wish that same thing for you as well. But words can cut deep and having someone misunderstand your intentions can hurt as much as just about anything. If I misjudge people and am wrong, I want to be wrong having assumed the best about them. The bottom line is, I would rather be loving than be right.

Our family wants to fight for a world that knows how to lovingly disagree. We believe it starts when we operate from a position of love in all things. If your position only extends love to the people who agree with you, we want to respectfully challenge that position. We propose operating with a love so real and true that you are willing to roll up your sleeves and work alongside the very people that are most unlike you. Fear dissolves in close proximity. Our stereotypes and vain imaginations fall away when we labor side by side. This is how a house gets unified.

Think about it for a minute:  This could be one of the greatest restoration stories of all time.

Who’s ready to get to work?

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  • Michael Britton
    1:52 am, December 13, 2017
    I literally had a cart of your stuff from target last weekend. I thought, this stuff is pretty cool for Target and my girlfriend and I were shopping for our new apartment. A really nice guy who I think was gay, but I guess it doesn't matter, walked past our cart in front of the huge hearth and hand display and said "You know the people designed that stuff are homophobes, right?" and walked away. My girlfriend started googling while we were in the store because we are very pro-gay rights and believe in equality for all. We couldn't find anything where you explicitly said "gay is wrong" but your non-answers to very basic questions about equality spoke volumes. Every last bit of the Hearth and Hand stuff came out of our cart and went back on the shelves.
    A co-worker pointed me to this blog post when I told her about this. This has done nothing but make me feel that I did the right thing. A non-answer, as flowery as this entire post, just feels calculated and phony. Shame, you're stuff is decent - but not good enough to trade my core values for it.
    • Angie
      8:37 pm, December 13, 2017
      How you spend your money is your 1st Amendment right. Great your “very” pro-LGBT. You can be JUST as intolerant in your quest, if not more so. Which is what the SCOTUS just told the couple during the CO baker. Why expect others to just give up their core values bc of you or your $. You clearly didn’t know much about them, but took to gossip and social media. That’s not research. It’s the core of what’s wrong with too much of society today.
      The key is to win the argument with proof and positive example, with reason, NOT feelings.
      Why are your core values centered around what is or is not going on in the bed room? Your core values center around sex.
      Talk to Christians who are pro-people, pro-love. I am a Christian. I am pro-equality for everyone. God never assigned an order to sin, man does that. I can easy out reason and so called Christian who refuses a same sex couple a license or a cake...no court needed.
      I could go on...
    • Michael Britton
      3:48 pm, December 17, 2017
      @Angie: You are hilarious. Seems your core values are centered around sex and you are more interested in what’s happening in the bedroom. I didn’t say anything about sex. The point is not to win an argument, I hope you don’t go through life trying to “win” arguments. Sad state of being, really. And I never asked anyone to change their opinions, I came here and read the post for myself, straight from the source and...well, see previous post for my reaction.
      I looked up and read the info on the CO Baker. Uh, SCOTUS hasn’t ruled on anything, maybe go read the transcript. Interesting arguments on both sides. That has nothing to do with what you and I are talking about. The Gaines aren’t saying they won’t provide for gay couples, unless there’s another blog post you’d like to point me to.
      Also, if this is Angie from Angie’s List please let me know. I love your site.
  • Sandra McCall
    6:51 pm, December 5, 2017
    The challenge is to live someone when their opinions have ramifications for the safety and security of those you love. When people i know supports a person that expresses inflammatory rhetoric regarding entire groups of people it saddens and pains me.
  • Isabel Ross
    1:12 am, November 20, 2017
    I love this every time I come back to read it...such wise words! Thank you Chip Gaines!
  • Mary Seymore
    3:14 pm, November 10, 2017
    So beautifully put Chip Gaines. Thank you for those inspiring words. Just thinking of what a wonderful world this could be with a little more respect for all people makes my heart skip. You and your beautiful family are such an inspiration to us all. I pray for you to keep doing God's will for all mankind. You are a breath of fresh air. Love in Christ Jim and Mary Seymore
  • April
    9:13 am, November 10, 2017
    Wonderfully refreshing to see you and Jo believe what you live and live what you believe! You are a celebrity now and your goal is to use it for good. I see you meeting this goal. I love your shows and everything you touch because of the kindness and goodness you guys share. Everything is getting ugly in the world if you listen to the news, social media such as facebook too, I want to live in a world where people actually follow the Golden Rule do unto others as you would have them do unto you! Sometimes this cruel world seems overehelming then I meet someone who wants a softer kinder world to and for moments we connect and kindness rules makes me invigorated to keep going. Keeo trying to be kind and encourafe others to be too. Thank you for being the kind of people one can tune into with family and never be embarased or ashamed. We can follow you and know we are getting goodness filled into our buckets.
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